Kinky, they Call it

Me, I call it a movie of whiplash-inducing “What the fuckness?” The movie I’m referring to is The Demon (1979.) This is another Mills Creek gem and as horrible as this movie was, I still give thanks to the fine people of Mills Creek for letting me see it.
The basic plot is that there’s a killer stalking a town. Cameron Mitchel stars as a former Marine with ESP who, if I’m to believe the little envelope that the DVD came in, is the only person who can stop said killer. But this movie is so, so much more than this little summary.
It’s more like, if you put Black Christmas on a northbound train and Halloween on a southbound train then this movie would be the result.
The movie opens with shots of waves on a beach. A family is home. The mike was in a Golden Grahams box across the room, because it sounds like the mom tells her teenage daughter that she is oversexed for a fourteen-year-old. I hope I didn’t hear that. The killer attacks the mom with a plastic bag and kidnaps the daughter, Emily. Mom survives and dad hires Cameron Mitchell to track down the kidnapper and maybe Emily, if he gets a chance.

I was so happy when I realized that Cameron Mitchell was in this movie. You Msties reading probably remember him as Commander God/Santa from the episode Space Mutiny. This is almost as good as finding out that Rowsdower is in your movie. Almost… And it gives me an excuse to post a picture from the episode.

Sting, Debbie Reynolds, and God.


The attacks are weird and pretty unscary because they’re interspersed with shots of the ocean. I guess the movie takes place near a beach?
Mitchell’s character visits Emily’s bedroom to see if he can pick up any psychic impressions. He freaks out, sweats, stares into a mirror, and smells Emily’s Pillow.

Oh, and he also sees this creepy, blurry masked-face.

It’s kind of like a femme-William Shatner mask. Maybe a mask from his burlesque show.
This part of the movie is what I like to call Movie A. It’s kind of like a supernatural Black Christmas, what with the extended house-stalking and the death by plastic bag.
Now we meet Mary and Jo. They’re cousins who teach at the same school. Mary notices a creepy man lurking outside of the school.
Then the movie takes a quick trip to Boobs Disco. Yes, it’s called Boobs Disco. The movie’s from South Africa, does “boobs” mean anything in Afrikaners? Aside from what it means in English. Pics or it didn’t happen, you say? Fine, I see how you play.

I love this sign so much I want to get it tattooed on my face so that it’s the first thing I see when I look in the mirror.
Meanwhile, Jo is dating a guy that is heavily foreshadowed may be the killer. Dunh dunh dunnnnnh. This causes her to wear the ugliest dress she can find from the Maude’s cast-off collection.

Dad and Cameron Mitchell are still investigating the kidnapping. Cameron gives the dad some pictures he drew of his psychic impressions. Uhm, I may not be Jerry Saltz but these pictures look like they were drawn by a blind ten-year-old.

On the plus side, this part of the movie has about twenty-seconds worth of “Rapper’s Delight.” This confused me.
The dad is killed by the killer so the mom kills Cameron Mitchell. I don’t know how she plans to explain this to the police.
The movie now focuses fully on Mary. She’s been getting creepy calls and her neighbor tells her that he thinks that he saw someone prowling outside their house. Jo and her boyfriends are both killed. I think that Mary’s supposed to be a figure like Laurie Strode. This doesn’t work for several reasons. One, Laurie’s in high school when Michael Myers first attacks. That makes her survival even more extraordinary, since she’s not a full-grown adult. Two, Laurie is way more competent than Mary. Mary runs up and down the stairs pursued by the killer at least eight times. It really becomes like a Benny Hill sketch. Then, she takes her bathrobe off for reasons that I’m not entirely clear on and climbs into the attic. Yeah, that’s where I want to be a nude, a place full of spiders, fiberglass insulation, and spiders. She tries to climb out the roof but falls through the attic floor. Then she rips a shower-curtain down and makes it into a poncho.

By now I was laughing so hard that I forgot to be scared. Mary’s saved by her neighbor. He notices the screaming and the lights going on and off next door. This leads to my favorite part of dialogue in the movie, where his wife, who’s in bed says, “Kinky, they call it, or wouldn’t you know?” AHHHHH, old people sex!
In all fairness, this movie had some mildly, scary’s too strong a word, tense moments. But it suffers from terrible pacing. Plus, it’s pretty derivative. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, a lot of scary movies are derivative. But this one is so goofily executed.
Plus, there were oodles of continuity goofs. The serial killer only wore his mask about a quarter of the time, despite this big long scene of him doing push-ups and getting his mask ready. Sometimes he has these gloves on with silvery claws at the tips, kind of like Sylvia Brown if she were a serial killer. Sometimes he doesn’t. Cameron Mitchell’s character predicts that he’s a physical aberration but there’s absolutely nothing to back this up. Everyone in this movie has a different accent.
So, I’d say this movie would be fun to watch and laugh at with a group but it’s not actually scary or anything.

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About scarina

I like scary movies a little too much. I thought I'd share my obsession with you.
This entry was posted in 1970's, 50 chilling classics, slasher, supernatural and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Kinky, they Call it

  1. Fear Street says:

    So much ugliness. That dress…THAT DRESS!

  2. Pingback: I, For One, Welcome the Comet | Scarina's Scary Vault of Scariness

  3. Pingback: All You Gotta Do is Wiggle | Scarina's Scary Vault of Scariness

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